NLP Articles

How Emotional Intelligence Can Make You a Better Leader

Before starting this article I want to ask some questions so that it will be easy to explain and understand this topic clearly. Let’s start my first question is-

Who is a “Perfect Leader”?

Any guesses, what is the first thought that comes to your mind? A phoenix like person, who rise from ashes, capable of taking tough decisions, face nerve jangling challenges and impart guidance to other co workers too. A leader is a person, who stands during the thick and thins of life and maintain composure during the calamity and victory. He knows how to marshal the resources for desired output. A motivator, who always encourages his team to work collaboratively to achieve any specific goals.

All this is possible through high degree of emotional intelligence. Now what is emotional intelligence? Go down the article.

Emotional Intelligence-   

Emotional Intelligence EI or EQ in psychological term referred as an ability of human being to understand and identify him very well. In layman language it is “regulation of feelings”. EI identifies how to handle emotions, how to react in any situation and how to behave with other people. If a person has high degree of emotion intelligence then he knows himself very well, his nature and how his emotions can affect other human beings. This all states come under EI.

This is the reason why most of the people fail to achieve success in their respective field, fail to make healthy rapport and good business dealings. Therefore experts suggest that if a person has a rich emotional intelligence, then he can achieve success and surpass any milestone. Suppose a leader at the time of trouble roar at his team or a leader who keep calm and patiently handle the situation. Who is better?

There are five different elements which are essential for EI. These five key elements are as follows-

  1. Motivation
  2. Social skills
  3. Self awareness
  4. Empathy
  5. Self regulation


In a simple language as described by Goleman, “a passion for work that goes beyond status and money.” Leaders having strong motivation are always targeted towards their goal and they motivate others to do well. Obstinacy is necessary to fulfill your dreams; it is the force that takes you towards your success. Self motivated people beckon other people with passion.


Tips to improve your motivation-

Think about your own demands It means to thoroughly analyze your work. Why are you pursuing this job? Is this the place where I wanted to be? Am I satisfied? These all questions will tell you more about yourself. If you have to struggle with these then reexamine your career goals. Go in the root which causes this problem and resolve all. You will feel energetic and a new version of you who is all set to lead any team. Remember a self motivated person can motivate other by setting any example.

Know your position Consider your achievements and failures to see where you take any stand. This will be beneficial to analyze own self. Before you know others it is always better to start with own self. Visualize that how you are motivated to lead.

Be optimistic and search for goodMotivated Directors are very hopeful they are able to find anything good in any troublesome. That is the reason which makes them good leaders. They console and find a way through which they can reach towards their goal.

Try to find something good in any bad situation and make it habit. Gradually you will see you keep on growing in positive direction and you are encouraging others also with setting an example.

Social skills-

Leaders who are equipped with good social skills do well in business also. They are able to understand other person’s ability to work, feelings and sense of humor also. These are the basic requirements to be a good leader. Social skills make insights, empathy and knowledge to use in practice as corporate tools.

social skills

Social skills make you efficient to deal with challenges, handle worst situations and build mutual understanding and relationships with others. It will give you strength to control awkward situations, make good conversations and resolve disputes. That’s why experts of emotional intelligence advice to give priority to social skills.

Leaders furnished with social skills are good communicator too. They can encourage and cheer other person during the times, when things are against the tide. They have such kind of passion that after finishing with one mission they target towards new one. Doing thing is not a big deal but how nicely you execute them is crucial.

Key points to develop good social skills-

Develop the quality of appraisal othersAs a leader you can appreciate your team members not only for good deeds but also for their loyalty and dedication.  Remember giving praise is like adding extra sweetness to the dish.

Conflict resolutionWhen someone is working in a troop, then, it is well obvious to have conflicts but how you resolve these is an art. Holding your stress and pressure apart and making other colleagues calm is challenging.

Good communication skillsHow you talk to others are a part of communication. Build good communication skills to understand others and establish good relationships at work place.

Self awareness-

Self awareness defined as knowing yourself well that noone else ever. If you know your emotions, feelings, anger, weakness and strength then you must able to understand other’s also. It is building block of EI. It is establishing a personal parameter in which feelings are aligned in a perfect way that provides peace to others also. If something bad had happened to anyone in past then you can see impacts on his mind, mental status and behavior.

Self Awareness

Knowing yourself well is necessary in emotional intelligence because this will give you a clear idea about your personality. You will be well prepared with your weakness and strengths.

Tips to improve self awareness-

Controls your moodSuppose something very bad has happened in your project then how can you control your anger or other emotions is vital. If you shout at others and behaving in bad manners then it will increase negative point of your personality. So, it is better to learn how to deal with mood swings and be calm and composed towards the target.

Writing notesThis doesn’t means you have to make study notes, no not at all. Keep a journal this will help you to improve self awareness. Make a habit of writing thoughts just you need few minutes in a day. Day by day you will see changes and you keep on growing in positive direction.


Empathy is the cornerstone of EI and a leader with good empathy can put himself in other person’s shoe and analyze the situation. This way you will be able to react according to the demand of the situation. This helps a leader to understand other person’s distinctive problems and how these circumstances can affect on work also. Leader will help them to adjust in group and how to deal with others when something critical issues arrive. Members will feel easy to share any problem with you when they find it difficult for them to understand.


Tips for improvement of empathy-

Body languageSome people in habit while talking they cross their legs, move their feet back n forth and bite their lips. This all body languages tell others what you are feeling from inside and you are not giving any positive message. Pay attention people always love to listen that person who explains his thoughts and ideas confidently. Body language is an asset that builds strong emotional intelligence. If you are good in body language reading then you can easily understand what others want to say and you can respond accordingly.

Consider other people’s situations It is good to have own perspective but it is better to consider other’s situations and what they want to say.  Support yourself but yes look towards others also; you may get something better there also.

Understand feelingsAs a leader it is your responsibility to ensure work should be done well and in time but don’t forget to understand what others want to express. This means working extra hours so that work is to be done in time, doesn’t suits to all. So, if you feel any type of frustration in any colleague then better ask and give him any extra day off. This will boost his energy.

Self regulation-

Self regulation is all about controlling own emotions, so that no any frustration should be burst on others. How you control stress and motivate others and how you react in a situation are all come under self regulation.

Self Regulation

Tips to regulate yourself-

Have patienceWhen you encounter with something bad then think once that how you have to react. Don’t be panic and out of control to shout at anyone. Becalm and think before you speak. Instead of speaking loud on anyone it is better to write your negative thoughts on paper and throw it out without showing it to anyone else. Make it habit and after sometime you will see changes in yourself. It is an impressive quality of a leader to control his emotions.

Particular about your idealsWe all have something in our ideals which we can’t compromise in any situation. These all are values which mean a lot to us and we don’t want to lose them. Give some time in examining your morals and identify them. So, when you are in trouble and you have to take decision on ethics then it will be easy to you.

CommitmentsA leader should stand whatever he says, don’t show any type fluctuation. This will show negative impact on others. If something bad happens then accept it rather than to blame anyone. It will increase your respect and you will be a successful leader.

To be an effective leader you should be aware with these all and well prepared for any situation in future. Read and think twice about these all and then act.

                                        HAVE A GOOD DAY!!