Emotional Intelligence Training NLP Articles

Emotional Intelligence

Emotional Intelligence itself shows something which is related to emotions, feelings. Alfred Binet and Theodore Simon evolved a new modern IQ test in 1994. This intelligence measuring test has led many people believe that a person has higher IQ will be intelligent and naturally it is believed that he will get success in life.

But according to experts it is not necessary that a person with high IQ will be intelligent and so successful also. IQ is not the measurement of intelligence. Experts say that intelligence is comparative and it cannot be measured on these calculations. Instead of this all they say that IQ is a measurement of mathematical ratio and in compliance with CNN report IQ measures your problem solving abilities and reasoning.


So it is just a myth if you are smart enough then you are successful also. It’s all about your hard work and dedication towards goals that makes you successful.  In Ohio state centre for human resource a study is being conducted that revels that some person who were intelligent faced financial crisis in their life. Apart from this people who were less intelligent to them were financially stable and successful in their respective areas.

Now a days to get success you should be expert in emotional intelligent.

What is emotional intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence or Emotional Quotient is an ability to understand and manage your own emotions, feelings and those of others.

This term was first introduced by a graduate student named Wayne Leon Payne in 1985. He wrote a thesis titled as “A Study of Emotion: Developing Emotional Intelligence”. After this two American University professors John Mayer and Peter Salovey published two academic journal articles to introduce some information about EI “the difference between people’s ability in the area of emotions” in the year 1990.

The popularity of EI goes to New York Times writer and psychologist Daniel Goleman in his two famous books “Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ” and “Working with Emotional Intelligence”.

Key elements of EI-

Goleman categorized five various elements of EQ-

Self Regulation- It is regulating or controlling your own emotions. Generally it happens when we feel anger or anxiety we are unable to control these feelings. With the help of EI you can regulate them and can change these negative attitudes in positive attitude. Person with high EI perform certain things like: meditation, long walk, listening soft music and yoga to build positive energy around them.

  • Trustworthiness: Being upright towards work and team members.
  • Innovation: Welcome new ideas and changes to embrace creativity.
  • Adaptability: Flexible enough to make changes and develop.
  • Restraint: Don’t hold grudges, avoid negativity.
  • Conscientiousness: Takes responsibility of the deeds either it is done by you or your teammates.

Social Skills- People, who have good interpersonal skills build strong relationships, build deep trust and genuinely connect others to nurture any relationship. These types of people respect other’s feelings, beliefs and thinking unlike it doesn’t matches with them because they try to understand them. A person having good social skills will show these qualities-

  • An effective leader- they have ability to lead and guide any group or any organization.
  • A catalyst- they have capability to initiate and manage change.
  • An excellent team player- they have ability to create groups in order to achieve goals or target.
  • Effective at conflict management- they are expert in understanding, negotiating and resolving conflicts and issues.
  • Cooperative nature- they work collaboratively with colleagues to achieve common target.
  • An effective communicator- they deliver clear messages so that everyone can easily understand.
  • An influencer- they have quality to persuade any person easily in order to perform any difficult task.
  • A relationship builder- they build strong relations and alliances and nurture them with happiness.

Motivation- People with high EI always focused towards their goal with positive attitude. Even if there are several problems that hinder their path they will find one single path to conquer the goal.

  • Optimism- ability to move on despite hurdles with confidence in achieving goals.
  • Commitment- ensure all steps and procedures are relevant to achieve target of organization or troop.
  • Initiative- ready to face challenges whatever the situations are and to grab opportunities.
  • Drive for excellence- always plough on to ensure excellence and implement feedbacks.

Self- awareness- This is capability to recognize your own emotions and feelings. Once you are known to your weaknesses then you can easily manage them. Elements of self-awareness-

  • Self confidence- confidence in your own capabilities and strength.
  • Emotional awareness- being known to own emotions and impression of these on others.

Empathy- When you try to understand someone else’s feelings or situations then you put yourself in other people’s shoe; that is called empathy. This ability makes you to consider other person’s thought and concerns and you respond according to them. With this you will be a good decision maker because while taking decision you consider other’s opinions and thoughts. Some key factors of empathy-

  • Political cleverness- behaving well and work with the people including them who don’t agree with you.
  • Delivering service- Identifying, meeting and anticipating customer’s needs and provide services according to them.
  • Leveraging diversity- grab opportunities from different gender, religions, race, ages etc.
  • Developing subordinates- helping others to grow and strengthen their capabilities.

Why do recruiters think emotional intelligence is important?

According to studies done by US Department of Labor, if any organization hire bad employees that means with less skill then it approximately cost 30% of the employee’s first year probable earnings.

That’s why selectors hire those candidates who not only show that skills but also they have capabilities to perform extraordinarily.

How do recruiters decide which job applicants are the best matched?

If we go back in time it will show that recruiters hired those candidates those had higher education relevant to that post and demonstrated that required qualities in test. Studies reveal that relation between education and success is just a myth.

In this competitive era EI is in trend and selectors seek for the person those who have high EI. 71% recruiters told that EI is more important than IQ and they select candidates on the basis of higher EI than IQ. They gave reason that EI makes a person able to handle any situation. Even executives or senior officials those who have failed to handle their career requirements found with low EI. It is because they were unable to handle work pressure, failed to work in a team and can’t handle the change. Reason behind these all problems is EI

Qualities of high EI workers-

This is the era of EI and it is preferred over IQ. So, some qualities that are adhered by high EI personalities-

  • They set example with their memorable deeds.
  • Show empathy to their colleagues and teammates every time and especially in need.
  • Deal with pressure very effectively by staying calm in difficulties.
  • They resolve conflicts without any racket.
  • Show innovative and creative ideas to expand business.

Other qualities of high EI people-

  • They don’t run for perfection- People with high EI are matured enough that’s why they know people do mistakes and they learn from this. So, they don’t look for perfection.
  • They embrace change- People with high EI know that change is natural and they embrace it with positive attitude. They make plans by keeping this in mind if things are not gone as planned.
  • Balancing nature- In order to reduce stress level they know how to keep balance in their personal and professional life.
  • They set boundaries- They are respectful in crowd and dedicated to work but yes then know well how and when to say no without any hesitation.
  • They do not look back- People with high EI learn from their past and they don’t hold on. If something bad had happened in past they don’t hold grudges. They look forward for new opportunities and make maximum output from them.
  • Dedication for work- They fully focused on their projects and don’t distract by surroundings because they give importance to their work.
  • Self motivated- Motivation is a key to success keeping this in mind they work hard and motivate others also.
  • Positive attitude- Even there is hundred many hurdles that hinder their path they will find one path atleast to move on. They look for positivity and surround themselves with positive people. They avoid negative attitude people.
  • Self awareness- They know their weaknesses and strengths and how to use them for betterment of the future. Instead of looking at flaws they focus on strength to have good output.

How to increase EI?

If you want to work on your EI then take help from online assessments like offered by Institute for Health and Human Potential. These assessments are like tests where you can see your skills and you are lagging behind. You can improve in those areas with continuous work.

There are some EI books are also available like “The Emotional Intelligence 2.0” will also help you regarding this matter. You can exercise emotional intelligent skills with the help of this. Some valuable suggestions provided by EI experts are listen conversations with paying attention, greet people with smile, and try to understand other people’s situations, talk to your colleagues, take short tour to your work place and observe activities in movies or shows. These small things will lead you to big changes in your life.

Start considering EI in business and earn rewards-

In conclusion we can say that EI is crucial for success and involving this in your business will grow you bigger. Any organization with EI expert owners and employees show positive changes and success in work with team work. Build strong and positive relationships within organization and outside also. Nurture your relationship with your employees and your customers. Pay attention to EI and reach to the new height in success.